Do you ever wonder, “Did I choose the right one?” When the relationship started out you felt wildly in love, and now well, the affection seems to have died down. You start to wonder what changed and you remember when it felt different.
You have a sinking feeling that maybe you didn’t choose right. You feel confused and wonder about the clues you missed.
How did I not notice how messy his apartment was? I did, but I thought I could make it better. The fixer upper!!!
When you find the right person it feels wonderful. There is nothing like it. You have met someone who really gets you! Before long you’ve settled into a routine and a nice cozy way of life. Then…
Remember when you were willing to skip dinner to spend more time together? Now, one or both of you have “better things to do”!
What has changed? The very experience of being so close to another stirs up all kinds of feelings.
1. You start to notice things about your partner, that just get on your nerves.
2. It seems your partner has changed.
3. You feel like you need your own space.
4. Did you choose the wrong person?
Why some couples make it and some don’t and what we don’t know about falling in love.
When you start to feel a pulling back you might think you chose the wrong partner. But did you know that these feelings are a normal part of sharing intimacy? If you don’t learn this you might move on only to find the same scenario in the next relationship.
The idea of starting fresh might seem appealing, but it’s only a temporary reprieve.
The truth is, you have not chosen the wrong partner, you are just ignoring the real phases of love. You want to be close and you want a relationship. But subconsciously you realize being so intimate is risky, especially if you have been hurt before. You might be afraid of losing the relationship or losing yourself in it.
To create lasting love you can expect some negative feelings, and instead of running, use them to connect more deeply with your partner.
If you are in a healthy relationship share your feelings and thoughts… this can only bring more intimacy to the relationship.